The end of an era
Thursday, May 31, 2007
Very soon my friends...very soon. I hope to move to my new home on the web.....http://www.hunka.netFor now...just a place holder image, but rest assured, I will either shut down ben.rockin.net for good and move all content to its new place, or actually have a redesign for the new site.
oh...and I bought a house, so on June 13th...I'll be a homeowner. Perhaps we will have a party to celebrate. You all bring the food and beers, this kid's got a mortgage these days.
Labels: domain name, Stanage, update, website
I need an unstable woman for a drama filled relationship…
Tuesday, May 29, 2007
Hi there,I’m seeking a like-minded woman to share a disastrous 3-9 month relationship with, ending in acrimony, emotional chaos, and possibly legal proceedings.
My name is Ben, I live in Champaign , I’m 27 years old, fairly well educated, I hold down a good job and am pretty stable. I’m told I’m fairly good looking, but I’ll let you be the judge of that - I’m generally caring and very honest.
I am looking for an attractive female who will at first give me obsessive love, praise and devotion - but whose paranoia, self-loathing and fear of rejection and abandonment will eventually lead her to alternately push me away and pull me closer in a love/hate cycle that will lead to infidelity and the eventual emotional breakdown of one or other party - or if we’re lucky - both!
You should:
* be 20 to 35 years old;
* have a history of short, intense, drama-driven relationships;
* have undergone negative psychiatric evaluations in the past; and
* be willing to threaten self-harm and/or annihilation as a weapon to control your partner and make them stay with you and care for you.
Although not completely necessary, I would prefer women:
* with nice smiles;
* that have larger than average breasts;
* who are married or already in unstable relationships;
* that drink to forget; and
* who have had a previous established diagnosis of Borderline or Dependent Personality Disorder or Bi-Polar Affective Disorder - or who are currently taking Lithium Carbonate, SSRIs, or Tri-cyclic antidepressants
If you think you meet these requirements (and wow, I’m getting excited just writing them!), please don’t hesitate to get back to me as soon as possible. In the meantime, thank you for reading my advert, and do take care.
All the best,
Ben
ps This advert is in recognition of the big neon sign on my forehead that everyone else can see except me.
Labels: double meaning, funny because its true
Six Flags, or "I can't believe they put me on a bus with a bunch of 15 year old girls"
Monday, May 21, 2007
So Six Flags was a blast. I was there for 5 hours, I rode 4 rides, but I still had fun. Basically the only interaction I had with the kids was to count them when they got on the bus, and then tell them to come back to the bus at 4:00, and count them again. These are all small town kids too, so they were VERY will behaved, I was shocked when everyone showed up on time! I thought for sure someone would be late. So my job was very easy. Plus there were 3 other people, so it's not like I was even in charge of everything. So the fun part comes when we stop for food on the way back. After eating, all the kids climb back on the bus, and they are being loud and obnoxious. So this one kid gets on the bus and yells to everyone about how he got the cute employees number.With out even thinking I proceed to decimate this poor child's ego.
"Do you really think she gave you HER number? Here, Give it to me, I'll call it, I bet they pick up...'Hello? Wendy's, how can I help you?' What are you like...15? Can you EVEN drive yet? What are you going to do with that number? Call her up and have your mom drive you over? We are 2 HOURS from your house!"
Yeah, Anonymous #1...I'm not ready for marriage, and I'm for sure not ready for my own kids ;)
Labels: Anonymous
6 Flags and Stripes
Friday, May 18, 2007
Yep...goin' tomorrow. I'll be chaperoning a few of the Villa Grove Science Club kids on their end-of-year school trip. I guess once they are in the park, you don't really have to watch them? That's what the coordinator said at least. So basically, I'm there to ride up with them, let them loose, and count them when they all get on the bus later."How did you get hooked up with the Villa Grove Science kids Hunka?"
Well that's a secret I'll keep to myself for now.
Speaking of which...THIS is a funny story. So not everyone knows Hunka is my nick name (but thanks to Aaron, now everyone at Boltini knows it now). So at this party I guess a couple of girls didn't know my name, so they started calling me "Stripes" due to the shirt I was wearing at the time. So now that Jamie knows my name, she still has to refer to me as Stripes to her friends who have not yet had the opportunity to meet me a second time.
"Yeah, I was out with Ben the other night."
"Who?"
"Stripes."
"OOOHHhhhhh, that guy from the party."
Weekend? What weekend?
Tuesday, May 15, 2007
Between staying out till 5am, working at SC, and having to be on call (again!) all weekend....I'm beat. So last night, I took a night off and acted like a six year old. I watched four to five hours of cartoons, drank milk, ate cookies, and made stupid jokes at the T.V. with my pal Eric/Judd. At one point Joe came down and yelled "are you STILL watching that show! Jesus!" Thank god for T.V. on DVD. All in all a good night, and just what I needed before my evening of debauchery and rock star treatment tonight. A little R and R to recharge my engines.Next weekend is not special, but the weekend after is McCormicks. I think this will be the first year in like...9 that I havn't taken someone with me. But Colin and I have our own cabin so Phi Shacka Macka will once again open it's doors to welcome all dudes a safe harbor from the wives. And this time we won't have to sneak Jack into our cans of Pepsi will we? We can just drink Jack and Coke like regular people.
Labels: Joe, Judd, Shackamack
...and now for something a little less controversial
Sunday, May 13, 2007
Chris says that he might give me a private screening of "28 Weeks Later." It's not a solid plan or anything...but seriously...how many of you can say "I've had a private screening of _______"
Labels: Chris Rudin, movies, pride
Happy Cinco!
Sunday, May 06, 2007
I had this idea for this awesome post about dancing lesbians, and the complete happiness on their faces, and how it taught me something about how people in love treat each other.....but fuck that. I got a glass from Boltini!Boltini Lounge hosted what will go down in history as the best scavenger hunt ever. Not only did we have to find random things (lock of a bartenders hair, $2 from a stranger, etc) we had clues that once figured out, told us the name of a bar and the drink we were supposed to drink there. First ones back won some sorta prize from Bolts, but I was not part of the first group back so I didn't really see what they got. I think it was a free appetizer. I won 4 free martinis....I think my prize was better. And we all learned that second place is NOT first loser :)
Anyways...the free glass. So it's about 6:00 at this point and we are all heading over to Greg's house for more Cinco fun. And I look up at the iron archway that spans the ally next to Boltini, and lo and behold, there's one of those swank glasses they server their drinks in. So I climb (ungracefully mind you...I had about 5 beers and 3 shots in me) up this arch, and grab the glass off the top of it.
It now sits next to my tampons and Bass Bottle, which has become some sort of place of honor in my room.
Where have you been?
Wednesday, May 02, 2007
Well...read the previous post dummy! I'm fucking busy these days. Then on top of all that, Mathematica 6 went live...and I had to update all those pages. So while there are tons of stories to tell, like the trashy mom with the cigarette burns on her arm, or WHO is showing up to this party tonight...I don't have time to tell write it out. I just have time to say...I'm busy. More later.In the mean time....play with this
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